It's late. The night before my last day at atlanta bread company-abc.
I just have to write in here because I feel compelled to share with you all how faithful God has been to me- He is always faithful.
God has shown to me how He is my Provider. 7 months ago, I applied to all sorts of ransom jobs near my house in Greenville, and one day I went to Atlanta Bread to eat and a guy that worked their, who knew me as I was a regular as a student, suggested that I just apply for a job there because I shared my future plans with him.
About 3 days later, Amber from ABC calls me-I got an interview, and got the job, with my boss knowing about my plans to join staff and raise support.
It has been such a provision for me- I have loved working there. I feel very close to alot of the people I work with, and honestly am in tears as I type. I dont think my heart is so prepared to not be making sandwhiches with Amber, joking about my problems with directions, hanging out with Sarah, distracting Becky in the bakery, bugging Andrew about his grades, telling Fabi my life stories. ...
This transition nto full time support raising is something unknown to me and new..I confess Im scared!
God is faithful and He will provide for me, I know. Please pray for courage and strength in this weird in between place that I am. How thankful I am for my time at ABC.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Friday, February 27, 2009
prayer
I really wanted to update this blog, but wasnt sure at all about what to write about.....so, I began to think about my own needs/ what I am experiencing, and if you're reading this, I want to invite you to pray with me and for me as I move forward in trusting God.
So, what am I experiening and enduring right now? To be quite honest with you, I am experiencing a testing of my faith and trust, a call to deeper dependency on God. If you know me well, then you know that I'm quick to rely on myself. I struggle constantly with feeling the burden of doing the right thing, being that person who is so reliable, who is consistent, etc etc. I am a perfectionist at heart. So , what im trying to say is that I always fail. I always fail myself, others, my own expectations,...because Im NOT Christ! It's such a freeing thing to really rest in the fact that God is in control, I'm not, and never will be. Nothing I do or dont do changes the way that God sees me as I am covered by Christ!
So, lately, I have grown a bit weary in support raising, as I feel the burden and the time pressure. My goal is to raise all my funds before this summer, when I will go to Myrtle beach for the entire summer for Campus Outreach's leadership project, an 8 week experience for college students. I am so so so excited!! I am craving more Christian community, as I have felt somewhat alone in all that I'm doing lately.
I have also decided to take a step away from time I am spending with students at Furman- still leading the senior girls, but making sure that they are my priority above other relationships. This has been so hard for me!! I always want to say yes to people when they initiate towards me. But God is truly testing me, as this past week alone, He provided 6 opportunities for me to say no. 6!!! Now if that isnt the Lord! I am sure of it.
I am trusting God for support raising. Let me rephrase that. I am attempting to trust God for support raising. I'm not doing that great of a job at it. These past two weeks have been very emotionally draining for me, as well as physically exhausting. I have honestly felt a great burden on my shoulders, and I know it s a result of my trusting in Lindsay and not in Christ.
So, as you read this, would you committ now to saying a short prayer for me? Ask God to draw me nearer, and the Holy Spirit to enable me to trust Him with my whole heart. Let's ask God in faith through Christ to accomplish this task set before me.
Thanks!
James 1:2-7
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. 6But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; 8he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.
John 15:7
If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.
So, what am I experiening and enduring right now? To be quite honest with you, I am experiencing a testing of my faith and trust, a call to deeper dependency on God. If you know me well, then you know that I'm quick to rely on myself. I struggle constantly with feeling the burden of doing the right thing, being that person who is so reliable, who is consistent, etc etc. I am a perfectionist at heart. So , what im trying to say is that I always fail. I always fail myself, others, my own expectations,...because Im NOT Christ! It's such a freeing thing to really rest in the fact that God is in control, I'm not, and never will be. Nothing I do or dont do changes the way that God sees me as I am covered by Christ!
So, lately, I have grown a bit weary in support raising, as I feel the burden and the time pressure. My goal is to raise all my funds before this summer, when I will go to Myrtle beach for the entire summer for Campus Outreach's leadership project, an 8 week experience for college students. I am so so so excited!! I am craving more Christian community, as I have felt somewhat alone in all that I'm doing lately.
I have also decided to take a step away from time I am spending with students at Furman- still leading the senior girls, but making sure that they are my priority above other relationships. This has been so hard for me!! I always want to say yes to people when they initiate towards me. But God is truly testing me, as this past week alone, He provided 6 opportunities for me to say no. 6!!! Now if that isnt the Lord! I am sure of it.
I am trusting God for support raising. Let me rephrase that. I am attempting to trust God for support raising. I'm not doing that great of a job at it. These past two weeks have been very emotionally draining for me, as well as physically exhausting. I have honestly felt a great burden on my shoulders, and I know it s a result of my trusting in Lindsay and not in Christ.
So, as you read this, would you committ now to saying a short prayer for me? Ask God to draw me nearer, and the Holy Spirit to enable me to trust Him with my whole heart. Let's ask God in faith through Christ to accomplish this task set before me.
Thanks!
James 1:2-7
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. 6But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; 8he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.
John 15:7
If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Jessica Pety
A year ago today, Jessica Pety died in a car wreck. The news was shocking and sorrowful for me and all of her dear friends. Jess was preparing to be a missionary in Spain for 18 months, and was in training at the time of her death. Jessica and I were room mates at the Beach Project 2 summers ago- we had 2 other girls in our room too, and all of us got really close. Jess and I bonded late at night, as we both liked to stay up late and chat, and those are some of the best memories I have. I have to admit to you, that she was more than a friend to me, she was a discipler to me in the way she lived her life and the way she believed in me as a disciple of Christ. In my heart I will never understand why God chose to take her, but I do know that she is happier than she has ever been- she was so in love with Christ. Things that I remember fondly about her-
-she loved movies! And had a ton of them
-she needed alot of rest and would often sleep in late
-Jess loved reading John Piper sermons
-she loved being around people, talking with people, and had the most relational capacity of anyone I have ever known in my life
-before bed at night, Jess would always take her Bible with her to bed and read some of it before she fell asleep
-like me, she had no sense of direction! We have gotten lost together plenty of times
-we bonded over our love for shopping & food
-she always twirled her hair when she was listening to you
-jess was very close to her family like me
well i could write on and on and on...but i want to type a card she wrote me at the end of our summer together because it means so much to me:
"My darling Lindsay Owens,
I cannot even say in words how grateful and lucky I feel that I got to be in your room this sumer. Lindsay, it has been so fun to just get to know you-the real, crazy Lindsay that I have grown to love so much.
I want to thank you, Lindsay, for your friendship this summer-for loving me, accepting me and giving me grace, and for all the fun we had together. You have no idea how those little moments w/ you got me through the summer. It was such a gift to be able to feel the freedom to just be myself around you, and you were such an encouragement when I was going through hard times and just needed someone to push me on. Lindsay it was also such a blessing to get to watch you grow and learn more about the LORD and your walk with Him this summer. Lindsay, what I saw in you was an open, humble, and teachable spirit. You always could talk about the things you struggle with without feeling like you have to make excuses or defend yourself. I loved getting to walk with you throughh issues such as your family, things that are hard at Furman, and struggles we share such as shopping. Thank you for being so open with me about those things. I learned so much from you this summer and was blessed beyond belief through your presence as a friend and fellow soldier in the room.
So.. its cool that we both go to furman b/c I know that this friendship can continue in the Fall and beyond! I'm so excited about accountability in August and pray that God will teach us and challenge us through that.
So, press on and keep fighting the fight, remembering that no matter what the world might tell us is gain, Christ is all we truly need!
Love always,
Jessica
" I thank my God every time I remember you"
I know that if she were here, she would be my greatest encourager.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Nothing Can Separate Us from the Love of Christ
I was reading on John Pipers website today a talk called "Nothing Can Separate Us from the Love of God."
I really think it hits home that God is sovereign, and the only stable thing in this world. The only One we can put our trust in. For me right now, He is calling me to a place of deep trust, of finding joy even when my agenda and goals arent met. And more than that, reading this helps me cope with death.
It is getting to be about a year anniversary that one of my best and dearest friends died. Almost a year ago, Jessica Pety died in a car accident as she was in training to be a missionary and was with a team preparing for what God had called her to. To this day, I don't think I have fully comprehended that she is gone, I find myself expecting to see her again- and I will, just not in my lifetime on earth. It has been one of the hardest things to trust God with, and I still ask why. So, through the healing process, this sermon has been good for me to read. I confess that Im frightened and terrified of death, and i know that I shouldnt be, but I am.
Piper uses Romans 8:35-39-
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36 As it is written, "For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered." 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
And, a woman who has lost her husband in 9/11 shares how the Lord has been and is her stronghold, and gives 10 lessons.
I want to type them briefly, but read it to get a more personal taste-
1..Embracing the sovereignty of God brings strength and hope.
2. Don’t presume to know better than God how to run the world. It is pride.
3. God has a good purpose in all the hard things that happen to his people.
4. Death and suffering press in on us the perspective of eternity.
5. God’s distribution of suffering is not equal, and one hard thing may prepare for another.
6. God’s love takes care of us right now in our suffering, not just later.
7. Calamity calls for quick practical love like meals and baby sitting.
8. Quiet, confidence in God’s power and goodness through suffering create occasions for witness.
9. Trusting in God’s sovereign care in all circumstances frees you from greed and releases love for others.
10. Without God the world is hopeless.
read or listen to it at -http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Sermons/ByDate/2002/103_Nothing_Can_Separate_Us_from_the_Love_of_Christ/
I really think it hits home that God is sovereign, and the only stable thing in this world. The only One we can put our trust in. For me right now, He is calling me to a place of deep trust, of finding joy even when my agenda and goals arent met. And more than that, reading this helps me cope with death.
It is getting to be about a year anniversary that one of my best and dearest friends died. Almost a year ago, Jessica Pety died in a car accident as she was in training to be a missionary and was with a team preparing for what God had called her to. To this day, I don't think I have fully comprehended that she is gone, I find myself expecting to see her again- and I will, just not in my lifetime on earth. It has been one of the hardest things to trust God with, and I still ask why. So, through the healing process, this sermon has been good for me to read. I confess that Im frightened and terrified of death, and i know that I shouldnt be, but I am.
Piper uses Romans 8:35-39-
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36 As it is written, "For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered." 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
And, a woman who has lost her husband in 9/11 shares how the Lord has been and is her stronghold, and gives 10 lessons.
I want to type them briefly, but read it to get a more personal taste-
1..Embracing the sovereignty of God brings strength and hope.
2. Don’t presume to know better than God how to run the world. It is pride.
3. God has a good purpose in all the hard things that happen to his people.
4. Death and suffering press in on us the perspective of eternity.
5. God’s distribution of suffering is not equal, and one hard thing may prepare for another.
6. God’s love takes care of us right now in our suffering, not just later.
7. Calamity calls for quick practical love like meals and baby sitting.
8. Quiet, confidence in God’s power and goodness through suffering create occasions for witness.
9. Trusting in God’s sovereign care in all circumstances frees you from greed and releases love for others.
10. Without God the world is hopeless.
read or listen to it at -http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Sermons/ByDate/2002/103_Nothing_Can_Separate_Us_from_the_Love_of_Christ/
Sunday, January 18, 2009
updates
well, i wanted to write a little update while i have a few minutes! If you read this blog, then youre probably pretty connected with me and my ministry, so I am going to talk a little bit about support raising
So, since the holidays, with the help of my support coach, Abbye ( on staff at pc and one of my good friends), and my sister, we devised a more realistic plan of action. I have to confess that after the dc conference, I was very overwhelmed about raising my funds. But, as many people have encouraged me, are supporting me, and like Mary Beth, one of my roomies said to me, God is teaching me alot THROUGH the process of support raising. And He is. Teaching me alot about who I am, that He is who He says He is, sovereign above all, worthy of my trust, worthy of my whole life. So if you want to pray for me, please pray that I would continue to seek Him, that He would show me areas of my life that I dont want to give over, that I would trust and learn and grow in this process of support raising. I am at abou 35 % pledged, so thats kinda far from 100%. If you know me, you know Im a glass have empty perspective, so, Im going to be an optimist and say, thats not too close to 0%!! I am so so thankful for all of my loving, encouraging, and faithful supporters. It delights my heart and gives me strength to have a team of people praying and partnering with me!
Well, alot of my time recently has been spent with my sister, emily, helping plan her wedding!! She will be married April 18th to a wonderful guy named Jake McCoun! He is also on staff with Campus outreach laboring at Presbyterian college- so, once I go full time, emily and i will be co workers throuugh Campus outreach greenville!!! (it is made up of Furman, Wofford, presbyterian, and Western carolina!) How amazing is it that God has provided this for us? I dont usually write about this stuff, but yes, it has been a bit hard for me being the "single" twin. emily and I have always done things together at the exact same time, etc. But not this time! I am more excited and thankful for God providing Jake and know for sure that there isnt someone else for her. And, I honestly do trust God has a plan for my life, as He has shown and continues to show, and it may or may not include marriage.
So, here are some verses that you can join with me in praying-
Proverbs 16:3
"commit to the Lord whatever you do and your plans will succeed."
Matt 6:33-34
"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough worries of its own. "
also, if you read this, please continue to pray for my girls- Furman seniors Jaycelyn, Stephanie, and Laura. We are studying the Psalms this term through a cool book called Encountering God. Pray that we would all spend time with Him each day, and that we would grow in understanding of who God is , and who we are as Christians. I love the time I spend with them, and cannot wait to make disciples!! Mary beth loaned me her book called "The Lost Art of Disciple Making" and it was so so so good. :)
So, since the holidays, with the help of my support coach, Abbye ( on staff at pc and one of my good friends), and my sister, we devised a more realistic plan of action. I have to confess that after the dc conference, I was very overwhelmed about raising my funds. But, as many people have encouraged me, are supporting me, and like Mary Beth, one of my roomies said to me, God is teaching me alot THROUGH the process of support raising. And He is. Teaching me alot about who I am, that He is who He says He is, sovereign above all, worthy of my trust, worthy of my whole life. So if you want to pray for me, please pray that I would continue to seek Him, that He would show me areas of my life that I dont want to give over, that I would trust and learn and grow in this process of support raising. I am at abou 35 % pledged, so thats kinda far from 100%. If you know me, you know Im a glass have empty perspective, so, Im going to be an optimist and say, thats not too close to 0%!! I am so so thankful for all of my loving, encouraging, and faithful supporters. It delights my heart and gives me strength to have a team of people praying and partnering with me!
Well, alot of my time recently has been spent with my sister, emily, helping plan her wedding!! She will be married April 18th to a wonderful guy named Jake McCoun! He is also on staff with Campus outreach laboring at Presbyterian college- so, once I go full time, emily and i will be co workers throuugh Campus outreach greenville!!! (it is made up of Furman, Wofford, presbyterian, and Western carolina!) How amazing is it that God has provided this for us? I dont usually write about this stuff, but yes, it has been a bit hard for me being the "single" twin. emily and I have always done things together at the exact same time, etc. But not this time! I am more excited and thankful for God providing Jake and know for sure that there isnt someone else for her. And, I honestly do trust God has a plan for my life, as He has shown and continues to show, and it may or may not include marriage.
So, here are some verses that you can join with me in praying-
Proverbs 16:3
"commit to the Lord whatever you do and your plans will succeed."
Matt 6:33-34
"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough worries of its own. "
also, if you read this, please continue to pray for my girls- Furman seniors Jaycelyn, Stephanie, and Laura. We are studying the Psalms this term through a cool book called Encountering God. Pray that we would all spend time with Him each day, and that we would grow in understanding of who God is , and who we are as Christians. I love the time I spend with them, and cannot wait to make disciples!! Mary beth loaned me her book called "The Lost Art of Disciple Making" and it was so so so good. :)
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
prayer
Recently, God has been teaching me alot about prayer, especially about my dependence on Him through prayer and strengthening my faith in Him in devotion to prayer. Please pray that I would pray daily and set apart times to pray! Here are some really cool things on prayer that John Piper (desiringgod.org) says-
http://www.desiringgod.org/Blog/1566_9_ways_to_pray_for_your_soul/
9 Ways to Pray for Your SoulJanuary 2, 2009 By: John Piper Category: Commentary
Here are some ways to pray for yourself so that you're praying in sync with the way God works.
1. For the desire of my heart to be toward God and his Word.
Incline my heart to Your testimonies and not to gain. (Psalm 119:36)
2. For the eyes of my heart to be opened.
Open my eyes, that I may behold wonderful things from Your law. (Psalm 119:18)
3. For my heart to be enlightened with these “wonders.”
[I pray] that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened. (Ephesians 1:18)
4. For my heart to be united, not divided, for God.
O Lord, I will walk in Your truth; unite my heart to fear Your name. (Psalm 86:11)
5. For my heart to be satisfied with God and not with the world.
O satisfy us in the morning with Your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days. (Psalm 90:14)
6. For strength in this joy, and endurance during the dark seasons.
[I pray that God] would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man. (Ephesians 3:16)
7. For visible good deeds and works of love to others.
[I pray that you] will walk in a manner worthy of the Lord...bearing fruit in every good work. (Colossians 1:10)
8. For God to be glorified.
Hallowed be thy name. (Matthew 6:9)
9. In Jesus’ name.
He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, will he not also give us all things with him? (Romans 8:32)
also, if you have time, listen to or read this sermon-http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Sermons/ByDate/2008/3468_Put_in_the_Fire_for_the_Sake_of_Prayer/
:)
http://www.desiringgod.org/Blog/1566_9_ways_to_pray_for_your_soul/
9 Ways to Pray for Your SoulJanuary 2, 2009 By: John Piper Category: Commentary
Here are some ways to pray for yourself so that you're praying in sync with the way God works.
1. For the desire of my heart to be toward God and his Word.
Incline my heart to Your testimonies and not to gain. (Psalm 119:36)
2. For the eyes of my heart to be opened.
Open my eyes, that I may behold wonderful things from Your law. (Psalm 119:18)
3. For my heart to be enlightened with these “wonders.”
[I pray] that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened. (Ephesians 1:18)
4. For my heart to be united, not divided, for God.
O Lord, I will walk in Your truth; unite my heart to fear Your name. (Psalm 86:11)
5. For my heart to be satisfied with God and not with the world.
O satisfy us in the morning with Your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days. (Psalm 90:14)
6. For strength in this joy, and endurance during the dark seasons.
[I pray that God] would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man. (Ephesians 3:16)
7. For visible good deeds and works of love to others.
[I pray that you] will walk in a manner worthy of the Lord...bearing fruit in every good work. (Colossians 1:10)
8. For God to be glorified.
Hallowed be thy name. (Matthew 6:9)
9. In Jesus’ name.
He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, will he not also give us all things with him? (Romans 8:32)
also, if you have time, listen to or read this sermon-http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Sermons/ByDate/2008/3468_Put_in_the_Fire_for_the_Sake_of_Prayer/
:)
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Recent Pics!
The engaged couple on New Years!
Me, Brittni, & Christine (plus Josh)- our CCP running crew!
Me & the girls in DC! We are captain planet & the planeteers!
Free day in DC! About to get on the metro :)
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